In the Headlights

Deacon Brodie

In Edinburgh, we lunched at Deacon Brodie's, a pub on the Royal Mile, and a perfectly situated stop for visitors who are walking, shopping and visiting historical sites.

The pub was named for Deacon William Brodie, who was born in the mid 1700's, and grew up to be a respectable cabinet maker and city councillor in Edinburgh.  But he also gambled, and as his debts grew, he took to criminal means to support his lifestyle.  His secret life also included two mistresses and five children. 

He not only built cabinets, but he installed and repaired locks.  Thus he was perfectly situated for a live of crime.  As president (deacon) of the Incorporation of Wrights and Masons, he had some status, and socialized with some members of the upper crust. In addition, he was often called upon to make repairs in houses of the gentry. Thus, he not only had ample opportunity to survey their belongings and the layouts of their houses, in repairing and installing their locks, he was able to make was impressions of their keys.

Almost twenty years after his criminal career began, Brodie took on three thieves, and planned an armed raid on the Excise Office in Cannongate.  When the raid went awry and one of his henchmen was captured, he sang like a canary, and the jig was up.  Brodie had violated the K.I.S.S. principle.

He escaped to the Continent, but was captured and returned to Edinburgh for trial.  He was hanged on October 1, 1788.  A popular story claims that he had built the gallows and was the first hanged on it, but that seems to be apocryphal.  Apparently, he innovated "the drop".

It is also said that with his double life, he was the inspiration for Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  Robert Louis Stevenson's father owned furniture made by Brodie, but as far as is known was not robbed by him.

There is a pub in New York City named after him, within walking distance of the hotel I'm staying in next month. Hmmm.  Sounds like a good place to check out.

[Illustration via Fortune City]

Wild, Wild Turkeys, Couldn't Drag Me Away

I had heard that Benjamin Franklin had been unhappy with choice of the bald eagle as our national bird, and would have preferred the wild turkey to be our symbol.  According to Wikipedia while Franklin objected to the eagle, he did not specifically advocate for the turkey.  From that article, here is an excerpt from a letter that Franklin wrote to his daughter in 1784:

For my own part I wish the Bald Eagle had not been chosen the Representative of our Country. He is a Bird of bad moral character. He does not get his Living honestly. You may have seen him perched on some dead Tree near the River, where, too lazy to fish for himself, he watches the Labour of the Fishing Hawk; and when that diligent Bird has at length taken a Fish, and is bearing it to his Nest for the Support of his Mate and young Ones, the Bald Eagle pursues him and takes it from him.

With all this Injustice, he is never in good Case but like those among Men who live by Sharping & Robbing he is generally poor and often very lousy. Besides he is a rank Coward: The little King Bird not bigger than a Sparrow attacks him boldly and drives him out of the District. He is therefore by no means a proper Emblem for the brave and honest Cincinnati of America who have driven all the King birds from our Country . . .

I am on this account not displeased that the Figure is not known as a Bald Eagle, but looks more like a Turkey. For the Truth the Turkey is in Comparison a much more respectable Bird, and withal a true original Native of America . . . He is besides, though a little vain & silly, a Bird of Courage, and would not hesitate to attack a Grenadier of the British Guards who should presume to invade his Farm Yard with a red Coat on.

NPR recently reported on Bostonians battling wild turkeys.  Homeowners spotted turkeys in their yards, then groups started roaming the streets, attacking children and joggers.  One woman reported being attacked by a turkey who went after her beating his wings and attacking with his talons.  She kicked him in the chest, and escaped to a neighbor's house. 

They have been appearing all over the country where acorns and nuts drop from trees.   The turkey's appear to see humans as other turkeys and attempt to establish dominance.  They also hang around back yards, leaving droppings that only 20 to 30 pound birds can leave.

Hmmm.  Maybe we'd better stick with bald eagles.

[Image from Wild Turkey Hunting Network]

Mary King's Close

One of the most popular historic tourist sites in historic Edinburgh is Mary King's Close, off the Royal Mile.  The Close was just a warren of narrow streets with tall houses houses, dating back to medieval times as does much of the city.

In 1645, during an outbreak of the Black Plague, in an effort to limit the spread of the disease, the Close was placed under quarantine, and its inhabitants were sealed in their houses.  Those with plague likely died of it.  Those who weren't sick either got sick, or died anyway, of starvation.  That is one version of history.  Another is that families weren't bricked in, rather quarantined and given food and drink.  Horrible either way.

In the mid 1700's, some of the houses were leveled, and others used as foundation for the new mercantile center, the Royal Exchange.  Many of the houses remained intact beneath the foundation, and when workmen knocked a hole in the floor of the Exchange and found a staircase, these historic chambers were discovered.

Today, they offer tourists a glimpse into the past as well as some pretty haunting ghost stories.

[Image 1 from Offbeat Travel.  Image 2 from Travelworld International Magazine.] 

Adam Watters: A Modern Hero

If you've walked along the Royal Mile in Edinburgh any weekend in the last nine or so years, you may have spotted William Wallace chopping off heads.  In truth, he is hard to miss.

Wait a minute...William Wallace?  Isn't he a bit old?  Didn't he live in the 1200's?

Adam Watters is a history buff.  Particularly, the history of the Jacobites and the Battle of Prestopans.  During the week, he works as a machine operator in a Scots factory, but on weekends, he dons a costume he has fashioned, paints his face and comes to the Royal Mile as William Wallace.  He looks great, scary and menacing, and somehow so hot in that skirt, you wish he'd kidnap you.

He asks for donations to have your picture taken with him, brandishing axe or sword.

He'd be a rich man if he kept the money.  Instead, he gives it leukemia charities.  Over the years he has given tens of thousands of pounds. 

Recently, he has gotten some bit parts in movies, and had a role in "Pirates of the Caribbean:  Dead Man's Chest."  His factory days may be about over, but hopefully he'll remain a fixture on the Royal Mile, seen and remembered by thousands of people a day.

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Leukemia is a bad actor, and I was saddened, as were many of us (and surprised too) at the passing of Ed Bradley to this scourge.

Adam Watters is a hero for helping fight leukemia.

What Would Miss Manners Say?

Debrett's, or as it is formally known, Debrett's Peerage and Baronetage was first published in 1769, and is the behavior guide for the British Upper Crust. It also contains genealogical information about every British Duke, Marquess, Viscount, Earl, Baron and Baronet, along with listing the all-important living male members of the line. It was doubtless the first thing Bertie Wooster ever read.  It guides debutantes and their escorts how to behave in the presence of the Queen, which fork to use, and never to grind out their cigarettes on the host's carpet.

Oh, wait, that last bit is in the new Debrett's.

Debrett's Etiquette for Girls, in an effort to stay current, at least for those likely to hang with the younger Royals, gives advice about one-night-stands like "avoid dark-alley gropery and unladylike fumbling in the back of a cab."  The language is charmingly 60's like this:  "Discuss the necessaries to avoid planting any love children or disease, and you're away."

I'm sort of disappointed.  I think there are lots of venues for the peerage to get sex advice, and I doubt that any of them will turn to Debrett's first.  That's not what it's for. 

This new Debrett's should be real good for a laugh, though.

[Story via Reuters Oddly Enough News.  In its entirety here]

Phrase of the Day

The phrase of the day comes from James Reston's Dogs of God  Columbus, the Inquisition and the Defeat of the Moors, which I am working my way through (with Ruth Reichl for comic relief).

The title refers to the Dominican order, followers of St. Dominic who combated the heresy of the Albigensians, who were in turn rebelling against the excesses and corruption of the Catholic priesthood in southern France in the 1200's.  They were originally known as the Militia of Christ, and much later, the "hounds of God."  In the 1400's, the "dogs of god" were a Dominican order from which Ferdinand and Isabella's inquisitors were selected.

But the phrase of the day is "auto da fe".  I had seen it before and never stopped to think about its meaning.  Literally "act of faith", it was the public penance and execution of heretics and Jews during the Spanish Inquisition.

Ferdinand believed early on that he was God's chosen ruler and destined to unite Spain and free it from the Moors.  It did not hurt that he could also confiscate the holdings of many rich men and nobles by convicting them of heresy and having them executed. 

The burden of proof was on the accused, and thousands were tortured, convicted and executed.  The auto da fe was the spectacle under which the doomed were marched through the streets and put on public display, and then executed before large mobs, after long masses and sermons.

Describing the first auto da fe, Reston says "leading these dogs of God was the head dog, Friar Alfonso de Ojeda, radiant in the realization of his life's passion.  Behind the Dominicans came local magistrates, followed by soldiers carrying the wood for the fires. After them came the heretics, nooses around their neccks, holding devotional candles and dressed in yellow gowns of shame.  Flanking the condemned were  halberdiers, carrying their ax lances, vigilant lest any of the apostates should bolt and run.  And behind them came other hooded friars, chanting admonitions to repentatnce and invocations to salvation.  And finally came the drummers, beating a slow beat of impending death on their kettledrums."

A later auto da fe under the Grand Inquisitor, Tomas de Torquemada, took place in Toledo in February, 1486.  "750 lapsed Christians were paraded through the streets from the Church of San Pedro Martir to the cathedral where they were to be reconciled to the Christian faith.  In the freezing cold, the men walked barefoot and hatless, but the women had it worse.  They were absolutely naked, adding leering lasciviousness to the other roiling emotions that an auto-da-fe induced.  All carried candles, as the feverish crowd taunted them along the way."

Following the sermons, the accusations and confessions, however extracted, were read out.  The penitents were given one last chance to admit guilt and repent.  Those who converted on the scaffold were allowed to be strangled before being burned.

"The true faith was satisfied.  Repentance constituted the final victory of the Church.  When the climactic moment came, ardent parishoners lit the pyre in the certain knowledge that they would be rewarded with indulgences for their pious deed. As the flames leapt upward, the Dominicans could be certain that no blood was being shed.  The purity of their oath to their order had been respected."

I think the phrase "auto da fe" is supposed to refer to the final act of repentance of the heretic, but it seems that it is actually a ritual sacrifice of faith on the part of the inquisitors.

I find Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain particularly fascinating as monarchs because they embody so much of the worst of medieval times and the best of renaissance.  They resurrected the Inquisition and brought it to heights never before dreamed, yet they had the vision to support Columbus.  They lived in a time that exemplified the middle ages, yet their daughter, Catherine married Henry VIII, and was stepmother to Elizabeth, one of the most enlightened monarchs in history.

[Illustration from the Florida Holocaust Museum]

The St. James Infirmary Blues

I went down to the St. James Infirmary,
Saw my sweet baby there,
Lying on the table
Stretched out, so pale so fair.

I went down to the St. James Infirmary,
All was still as the night,
My gal was on the table,
Stretched out so pale, so white.

Let her go, let her go, God bless her,
Wherever she may be,
She may search this wide world over,
But she'll never find a man like me.

Though she treated me mean and lowdown,
Somehow I just didn't care.
My soul is sick and weary,
And I hope we meet again, up there.

Above is the version of "The St. James Infirmary Blues" we listened to when I was young.  I can't remember who sang it.

Nor can I fathom why I have been singing it for the last couple of days.  Might be because I've been thinking about depressing lyrics and poems.  Maybe because Big Bad Voodoo Daddy did a number of New Orleans numbers from their New Orleans tribute album, Save My Soul.  "The St. James Infirmary Blues" wasn't one of the numbers, but it might have been the trigger. Many artists have produced a version of this great song. Both Louis Armstrong and Cab Calloway sang it.  So did Lou Rawls, Joe Cocker, Van Morrison, The White Stripes and The Animals, Janis Joplin and The Doors, among others.  All with different lyrics.

When I searched the song, I found a lot of different lyrics.  Many start with a man in a bar telling his story.  Others include a stanza where the singer speculates about his own funeral:

Now, when I die, bury me in my straight-leg britches,
Put on a box-back coat and a Stetson hat,
Put a twenty-dollar gold piece on my watch chain,
So you can let all the boys know I died standing pat.

Some of the discussion was about the fact that the singer talks about the dead woman never finding a man "like me".  Seems a little self-centered.  And whether the planning of his own funeral was because he anticipates his own death--that his sweet baby died of a form of veneral disease.  One early variant called "The Unfortunate Rake" includes this stanza:

And had she but told me before she disordered me,
Had she but told me of it in time,
I might have got pills and salts of white mercury,
But now I'm cut down in the height of my prime.

The song itself is of anonymous origin, though Armstrong's recording attributes it to "Joe Primrose", also known as Irving Mills, a musical agent and song writer.  But the song was around in 1899 as "The Gambler's Lament", but "The Unfortunate Rake" predates it as an Irish/British folk song, leading to the idea that the infirmary in question might have been in London rather than in New Orleans, as is often thought.

Anyone who's ever heard my try can attest to the fact that I can't carry a tune in a bucket, but I love belting songs like this out in the shower.  Another favorite is "My Man" which we listened to by Gogi Grant, when I was growing up.  (I had a strange childhood.  What can I say?)  The song represents such sorry sentiments ("He isn't true, he beats me too, what can I do?....Oh my man, I love him so..." )

But that's another post, for another day.  I have to pace myself.

[Image from Talk Talk]

Addendum, 9/11, 0752:  A comment from Rarity reminds me that she did a post on this very thing in her blog A Rare View on January 11.  I read it, and it likely revived this old song in my mind, and then events of this week brought it to the fore again. Thanks, R.

The Bunker is Open

I've had the pleasure of visiting the Greenbrier Resort in White Sulphur Springs, West Virginia, a couple of times.  While the stays were great both times, I regretted not being able to visit the bunker as it was under renovation.  After 9-11, my friends and I speculated that it was being renovated to again stand in wait for evacuation of Congress in the event of a nuclear attack.  Apparently not as it is open for tours.

This is from an article in The Greenbrier Magazine, Fall 2006:

THE GREENBRIER IS LETTING YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET--make that a big secret--with the reopening of a once-covert bunker designed to house members of the U.S. House of Representatives and Senate in case of nuclear attack.

The former U.S. Government Relocation Facility, commonly known as the "bunker," a 35-year partnership between the Greenbrier and the U.S. government, reopened in July for tours following major repairs and renovations.

"Visitors can now see artifacts and reproductions of the bunker's security and communications areas, dormitories, VIP lounges and medical clinic," says Dr. Robert S. Conte, Greenbrier historian.

For the uninitiated, the 112,544 square-foot concrete and steel bunker was hidden in plain sight, built 70 feet beneath the Greenbrier's West Virginia Wing.  Construction lasted from 1958 through 1961.

The reason for construction, Greenbrier officials explained at the time, was for an exhibit hall, clinic and about 100 guest rooms.  Construction workers and contractors may have suspected something was unusual--about 55 tons of concrete were delivered to the site and a 25-ton blast door was installed--but denials were always issued.

Upon completion, the bunker was maintained by a small group of government employees working as Forsythe Associates, a "company" hired by the resort for audio/visual support services.
For the next 30 years, Forsythe Associates kept the bunker in a constant state of readiness, updating communications and other equipment.

The long secrecy ended May 31, 1992, when The Washington Post published a story exposing the bunker.  Three years later, the U.S. government ended the lease agreement with the Greenbrier, which began offering tours of the historic structure.

"After we began offering tours, some groups chose theme parties that related to the bunker setting,"  says Jerry Wayne, the resort's vice president of sales and marketing.  "Among the more popular theme parties were James Bond, M*A*S*H, and patriotic themes."

Recent renovations added five meeting rooms, ranging from 670-730 square feet, now allowing groups to gather where the most powerful people in the world might once have assembled in a national crisis

"Meetings have played an integral role in the bunker history since its completion in 1962," Wayne says.  "Part of the cover story for the bunker was the addition of the Exhibit Hall and two meeting rooms, which were made available to groups meeting at the Greenbrier.  During the 30 years that the bunker was a secret, groups were meeting there and enjoying theme parties and dinners, without realizing they were in a top-secret government facility.  They never realized that the Exhibit Hall was actually designed to be the work place for the Congressional staff."

Daily guest tours are available.  Public tours are available twice a week from the White Sulphur Springs Civic Center.  For information and reservations, call the Civic Center or the Greengrier at 800-852-5440.

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A sidebar from the same article:

INSIDE THE BUNKER

The secret bunker was designed to house and protect hundreds of people.  The bunker contained:

-18 dormitories, designed to accommodate more than 1100 people in bunk beds; 

-a power plant with three 25,000-gallon water storage tanks and purification equipment, as well as three 14,000 gallon diesel fuel storage tanks;

-a communications area, which included a television production area and audio recording booths;

-a clinic area with 12 hospital beds, medical and dental operating rooms, laboratory, pharmacy, and intensive care unit.

[Illustrations: from Greenbrier slideshow:  Secret access to bunker from within the Greenbrier; 25-ton blast door leading into the bunker;  Large Congressional meeting room.]

Dreaming of Castles...

The September issue of Arthur Frommer's Budget Travel has a vine covered, turreted castle on the cover.

It seems that a number of genuine castles are also luxury hotels, complete with canopied beds and hidden passageways.  Some of the German castles featured also offer tourist tours in the daytime.  Some are exclusively hotels.  Prices range from $65 to $145 a night.  Here are links to the seven they feature.

Burg Colmberg
Burg Gutenfels
Kurfurstliches Amtshaus
Burg Hirschhorn
Kommende Ramesdorf
Castle Liebenstein
Burg Veldenstein
Schloss Hohenstein

These look comfortable and inviting. 

Check out the links to practice your German.

Uncyclopedia Declares Hostile Takeover

It's the Uncyclopedia, u-n-c-y-c-l-o-p-e...wait a minute.  That's not right. 

Yes.  It is.  Just don't keep that bookmark too close to the one for Wikipedia.

Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.

Learn that:

On this date in 1912, chipmunks were discovered on Mars.

And in the news:

Snakes Banned from Carry-on Luggage on Planes

Uncyclopedia Announces Hostile Takeover of Wikipedia

Britain Foils Toothpaste-Smuggling Terrorist Plot

Designed to misinform and mislead, the site is hilarious, and in terrible taste.  I had to go through about a half-dozen pages of "random articles" just to find something  I could link into a G-rated blog.  (I'm sure Aberdonians won't like what is said about them.)

Feel free to browse.  Just don't put any of these answers on your final exam.