In the Headlights

Being Jackson Pollock

Jackson Pollock was the tempermental, troubled developer of the "drip" or "pour" technique.  Actually, often both.

Though he died in 1956, his name is still very well known, and his canvases command big money.

Now you, too can be just like Jackson Pollock.  I mean artistic, not depressed.

Connect here and the drag and click your mouse.  You too can create beautiful art. 

I'd show you mine, except I can't figure out how to save it.

[Illustration:  Pollock's "Galaxy", from Wikipedia]

[Link to Jackson Pollock by Miltos Manetas via L.C.]

Monday's Word. Can you Dig It? Yes, I Can.

I ran across this word recently, and of course the first thing that crossed my mind was that I should share it.  Or rather, them.

Infra dig.  Short for infra dignitatem, Latinum of course, it means "beneath one's dignity", or "undignified".  As in "Dressing up like a duck was infra dig for the Norwegian ambassador".

Bartleby's says it's "not in accordance with one's position or character".  OK, that's consistent.

Example (from Oxford University Press):"It was somewhat infra dig for a man in his position to be found drinking." (Not to mention drinking in a duck costume.)

Or "waiting tables was infra dig for the out--of-work executive."

Many others give the example: "considered helping with the dishes to be infra dig." I think for many men (and some women), that would apply to all housework.

[Illustration from Easter Bunny Costumes]

An Eye-Opener

"Hilton Introduces New Upscale In-room Coffee System." 

At long last, someone cares about my morning coffee.  Sob. I'm so happy.

Many of you know that one of my favorite rants has to do with hotels that don't provide an in-room coffee machine.  And it seems that the more upscale the hotel, the less likely they are to provide this amenity.  My issue is that I want my first cup within minutes of waking up, and I don't always know when I will wake up, so I can't order room service ahead of time.  And I don't want to call down when I do wake up and have to wait for it to get there so I can let someone in, when I should be showering.  I just want to push a button.

In the next few months, Hilton will be introducing a Cuisinart dual-cup single brew coffee makers and Lavazza coffee from Italy. Lavazza is the largest family-owned coffee roaster in the world.  They sell Italians more espresso than any other coffeemaker.  Hilton's blend is Lavazza's Grand Filtro, a 100% Arabica blend.

It seems that the Hilton is adopting a number of luxurious in-room amentities which include, in addition to the coffee, Crabtree & Evelyn toiletries and the Serenity Bed (Serta Suite Dreams mattress and box springs), Super Topper mattress pads, Pacific Coast down duvet and high quality linens.

This is good enough for me.  On occasions when I have a choice of hotel, I'm going Hilton.

*     *     *     *     *

Shawn Lea, who has seen me rant on the subject up close and personal,  was kind enough to send this link to me. 

Killing Mr. Watson

Once in a while I read a book, and am conscious of the fact, as I read it, that I am in the presence  of greatness.  This should not be confused with saying I am reading a "great" book.  I mean a book that is great literature.

Killing Mr. Watson, by Peter Matthiessen is such a book. Debbie, who loaned me the book comes from many generations of Florida natives, for all I know some of them might have lived like characters in this book.  (Deb, are you descended from Mr. Watson?)  She said it was a wonderful book and she was right.  And more than that, it is beautifully written.

The setting is the Ten Thousand Islands, a group of God-forsaken islands on the Gulf coast of Florida off the Everglades, in the late 1800's and early 1900's.  About a dozen families live in the area in the beginning, most there because they are hiding from something.  They are pioneers, redneck crackers, barfooted, and making a living any way they can, from plume-hunting to alligator trapping to fishing .

Into their world comes Mr. Watson, charismatic and charming, strong and intelligent, a gifted farmer who is generous and open handed with his neighbors. He's a crack shot who always has a pistol at his side, who has a hair-trigger temper.  Is he the "desperader" who killed Belle Starr?  Is he being mistaken for someone else?  Or is he just a loving husband and father trying to make the best possible world for his family?

You learn the answers to these questions and many more, as statements taken from inhabitants of Chokoloskee and Lost Man's Key and the tiny settlements in between slowly weave the story and cast their spell.

In between, you learn about lawlessness, and politics, and the desecration of the land and the animals.  There are cattle drives in Florida to Fort Myers, and bar fights in Key West.  It is about racism and ignorance, insight and sensitivity, and the subjectivity of justice and the law.  It is about determination and survival in the face of the worst that nature and man can throw at you.

The story is told in their own words by a dozen or so family members and neighbors of E.J. Watson, who give different views of the events in the book.  Interspersed are newspaper articles from the time.  Debbie had told me it might take 30 or 40 pages to get used to the style, and she was right, but once I got used to it, I could scarcely put the book down.

*     *     *     *     *

Peter Matthiessen took some newspaper articles and books of the time, and the few known facts about these communities and Mr. Watson, and constructed this compelling tale.  He calls it a novel, but he interviewed dozens, some of whom were youngsters in the community at the time, and others who were descended from those who were there, and were willing to share their knowledge.  So it is a novel as based on fact as you could hope to find.

This is the first thing I have read by Matthiessen, who has had an award-studded writing career.  Including several nominations for the National Book Award, which he received for The Snow Leopard.  His other novels include At Play in the Fields of the Lord, and Far Tortuga.  In addition, he had a parallel career as a naturalist, which resulted in a number of highly acclaimed non-fiction books.

Gee Wiz

Do you have a tendency to wander off during commercials?

No more with this new advertising targeted at men.

Wizmark is the interactive urinal communicator.  Yep, a talking toilet. 

Built on the premise that a man using a urinal can't look at the person right or left of him,  they put the advertisement right in front of him.

The round device fitted on mesh screen is motion and light-change activated.  I imagine it could give a person a start.

From their website:

As a one-of-a-kind, fully functional interactive device, Wizmark can talk, sing, or flash a string of lights around a promotional message when greeting a "visitor". The large anti-glare, water-proof viewing screen is strategically located just above the drain to ensure guaranteed viewing without interruptions.  Using the elements of surprise and humor in a truly unique location will allow Wizmark, in combination with your ad, to make a lasting impression on every male that sees it.

Wizmark is the perfect attention-grabbing medium for advertising any male oriented product or service.  From beer products to cigarettes to condoms to sports to movies to tools to cars to anti-drug messages, these affordable interactive state-of-the art promotional devices can be placed inside bars, restaurants, theaters, office buildings, stadiums or schools, to advertise your business and product or promote your next public service message.

From the section on interactive (!?) electronic display: "...is your guarantee, that each and every viewer is a  potential customer whose eyes will not deviate from, nor be able to avoid in any way, an unhindered and focused viewing of your attention getting, original and unique promotional ad or message.."

Another hallmark of American ingenuity.  In a way, this is a brilliant idea.  A captive audience, subject to your message several times a day in, say, an office building.

One can't help wonder how long the electronics will work in the atmosphere of...um... moisture they are sure to encounter. 

I wonder how they'll target women.  Screens on the restroom doors, maybe.  I hate to think of a voice coming out of the toilet, adding yet another dimension to the ladies' room experience.

[Image borrowed from Boi Magazine]

The distinctive and novel location of your ad contained within our new and innovative, patented  interactive viewing screen, combined with the dynamics of its actual daily use, is your guarantee, that each and every viewer is a potential consumer who's eyes will not deviate from, nor be able to avoid in any way, an unhindered and focused viewing of your attention getting original and unique promotional ad or message..

The distinctive and novel location of your ad contained within our new and innovative, patented  interactive viewing screen, combined with the dynamics of its actual daily use, is your guarantee, that each and every viewer is a potential consumer who's eyes will not deviate from, nor be able to avoid in any way, an unhindered and focused viewing of your attention getting original and unique promotional ad or message..

The distinctive and novel location of your ad contained within our new and innovative, patented  interactive viewing screen, combined with the dynamics of its actual daily use, is your guarantee, that each and every viewer is a potential consumer who's eyes will not deviate from, nor be able to avoid in any way, an unhindered and focused viewing of your attention getting original and unique promotional ad or message..

The Worst Company URLs

Shawn Lea sent me these this morning.  Since she is not using them in her blog, Everything and Nothing, she kindly gave me permission to post them. The sites themselves are clean, but oh those URLs.

The top 10 unintentionally worst company URLs

 

   1. A site called 'Who Represents' where you can find the name of the

agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name:

www.whorepresents.com

 

   2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange

advice and views at:

www.expertsexchange.com

 

  3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at:

www.penisland.net

 

  4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at:

www.therapistfinder.com

 

  5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company:

www.powergenitalia.com

 

  6. The Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales:

www.molestationnursery.com

 

  7. If you're looking for computer software, there's always:

www.ipanywhere.com

 

  8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church. Their website is:

www.cummingfirst.com

 

  9. Then, of course, there's these art designers, and their website:

www.speedofart.com

 

  10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at:

www.gotahoe.com

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These are all nice looking sites.  I was able to check them all out, except powergenitalia.com which required a password.  They are probably tired of smart-asses like me (us?) getting into their site.

Polynesian Chicken

This is the first thing my late husband ever cooked for me.  He was cute and funny, and his cooking skills didn't hurt.  We took some of this on a picnic on Mt. Lemmon, outside of Tucson.  It was a great afternoon.

The recipe is from The American Home All-Purpose Cookbook, which moved in when we merged households and still holds its own on the bookcase.  It was published in 1966 by M. Evans and Company, Inc., New York.

A note on the side says "double sauce or it's too dry". The recipe below is as it is in the cookbook, so if you like sauce, double the liquids.

1 broiler-fryer (2-2 1/2 lbs.), cut up
1/4 cup soy sauce
3 tablespoons pure vegetable oil
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon onion salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
2 tablespoons instant minced onion
1/2 cup flour
3 more tablespoons vegetable oil
1 can (8 3/4 ounces) pineapple tidbits
1/2 cup orange juice
2 teaspoons cornstarch
1/4 cup water
1/2 cup orange sections
1/4 cup toasted slivered almonds

Wash and dry the chicken;  arrange in a single layer in shallow pan.  Combine soy sauce, 3 tablespoons oil, ginger, onion salt, pepper and onion; pour over chicken.  Let stand 1 hour, turning once.  Drain chicken; reserve liquid.  Shake chicken with flour in a paper bag until well coated.  Heat 3 tablespoons oil in skillet; add chicken; brown on all sides.  Chicken will be quite dark.  Drain pineapple,;  add juice to reserved soy mixture; add orange juice.  Pour over chicken in skillet; lower heat; cover;  simmer 30 minutes or until chicken is tender.  Remove chicken while making sauce.  Combine cornstarch and water; stir into liquid in skillet.  Heat until thickened and bubbly.  Add orange sections, pineapple tidbits, and chicken; heat until piping hot.  Sprinkle with almonds.  Make 4-6 servings.

Notes:

The first thing I noticed when typing this is the lack of fresh ingredients.  I am sure you could substitute fresh ginger and onion, and no harm would come to the recipe.

The other thing was that I have never in my life put so many semi-colons into a single paragraph. 

This is really good, hot or at room temperature.  Enjoy.

[Illustration from the Orlando Sentinel.  It's not the same dish, but this is pretty much what it looks like, except for the white and black sesame seeds, which you should feel free to add, if you so desire.]

The Forefront of Formal Fashions

I missed the prom.  There must be a wedding I have to go to soon.

(Via joe-ks)

Words to Reckon With

I recently wrote about my results from the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament.  I wanted to comment that the columns of numbers that had been aligned when I first wrote it, wound up all cattywompus, meaning, to me, "crooked", or "alop", maybe "out of whack".

So I tried the word, by no means sure of its spelling, on dictionary.com.  Their response:  "Did you mean 'cut worms'"?  I thought that was pretty funny.  I got the same response when I spelled it with a "k" or with an "a" where the "o" was.

So I googled it, and found it in the Urban Dictionary, spelled my way, but the definitions were pretty lame, leaning toward "diagonal from", with an entry that said it was "topsy-turvy or weird".

The Online Slang Dictionary goes the way of the Urban Dictionary, apparently thinking it means "diagonal from".  I disagree.

Here's the best explanation I found, from The Timeshare Beat, "talk about something tracking sideways, being a little out of round, or off kilter".

Wait..."cattywampus"  in the Urban Dictionary:  "not exactly centered or straight", "awry, askew, out of sorts".

Now you're talking.

[Image from Lintie]

American Crossword Puzzle Tournament-My Results

By now, you know that I enjoy crossword puzzles.

The last two years, I have participated in the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament from home.  My $20 buys my participation, I can solve and time myself at home, and have my puzzles returned graded, with my ranking. 

Each time, I felt I did great until I totally bombed the really hard puzzle (sigh).  One of these years, I'll nail that son of a gun, and my ranking will soar (dreams of glory).  And (horrors), I omitted a letter in the puzzle made by my hero, Merl Reagle. 

Here's how I did.  Remember that many of the contestants are hard core puzzlers.  Not innocent babes in the woods like me.

Division A (all contestants)                                                    166 out of 499

Division B (contestants who have not won a Division
A or B prize during their last seven tournaments.)                   127 out of 460

Division C (have not finished in the top 20% during
their last three tournaments)                                                   59 out of 386

Division D (have not finished in the top 40% during
their last three tournaments)                                                     7 out of 177

Division E (have not finished in the top 65% during
their last three tournaments)                                                     1 out of   89

In my age group                                                                       44 out of 141

Geographical location (South, including Arkansas
and Louisiana)                                                                         13 out of  34

Just wait until next year.

For more about the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, go see the documentary, Wordplay.

(Interestingly, when I wrote this, the numbers lined up, then when I previewed it, they were all over the screen.)